Simplicity seems to be the word lately.
Wait. Listen. Observe.
Be simple. Be humble.
Obey.
Trust.
Even at Mass, in prayer, I am trying to "do" less, and putting myself in a "receiving" mode. "Lord, here I am."
Friday at Mass, I heard one word about building bridges and reaching out, and followed the lead after Mass by calling a person who was in my heart. It was an important connection.
God saying,"Just stay in this frame of mind today. Just BE. Be receptive and responsive, but don't "try" to do things. Let Me lead. Take your eyes off yourself. Fix them on Me. Humility. Simplicity. Bring Me your broken, humbled heart. I'll lead.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Thursday, March 31, 2011
A Surprise and Secret Way to Joy
Oh my goodness!
A few days ago, in the Magnificat, the morning prayer intentions were focused on forgiving our enemies. The way they were worded in the booklet led me to a much deeper prayer.
A few years ago, I was deeply wounded by a friend. It was like a betrayal by Judas, and that's just how I felt: as if I had been stabbed with a daggar while my back was turned. It took me months of pain and prayer, and I had already come to a place where I pictured myself, like a state governor, admitting that a criminal was guilty, but pardoning him. I thought I was finished with the process.
But the way these intercessions were worded in the book --
Ack! These words on the page brought back all the feelings of the betrayal and theft, the disillusionment and heartache!
But I decided to pray for the prosperity and success of this man and his fellows who set up the betrayal!
Frankly, I was surprised, because I thought I was done with it all...but I was still staying away from places where I might see one of them. I certainly wasn't praying for their prosperity or success. But I absolutely hated having the hurt come up again. I just don't want to carry any of that any more.
My friend Kay had told me just recently that I needed to go back to the places where I could run into them, so that one of them might have an opportunity to apologize, and I realized that I am still under the situation if I am allowing it to keep me isolated.
So the other morning, I WILLED to pray that way for the people responsible for my pain. Give them prosperity and success, God. Grant them protection from the pain of betrayal. Grant them love. Grant them peace.
It was a simple act of the will. BUT I have been like a new person since! Really!
I have more energy, more enthusiasm about each day! I have found a deep JOY that I haven't had since the betrayal!!!
And I am FEELING it too. I mean, only through the grace of God, I am not holding onto the pain or anything. Through God's grace, I am MEANING it when I pray good for this person!
Yesterday I had the energy to do a little yard work, bake a double batch of muffins, do errands I had been putting off, and smile all day!
Please, my friends, if those words in the prayers above touched anything in you, DO IT! Step into this level of forgiveness and find this joy! Yesterday I prayed the Lord's prayer several times -- at Mass and in the rosary -- and each time I said:
I found myself smiling! Imagine You, God, forgiving me this much! Alleluia!
A few days ago, in the Magnificat, the morning prayer intentions were focused on forgiving our enemies. The way they were worded in the booklet led me to a much deeper prayer.
A few years ago, I was deeply wounded by a friend. It was like a betrayal by Judas, and that's just how I felt: as if I had been stabbed with a daggar while my back was turned. It took me months of pain and prayer, and I had already come to a place where I pictured myself, like a state governor, admitting that a criminal was guilty, but pardoning him. I thought I was finished with the process.
But the way these intercessions were worded in the book --
Give peace to those who have destroyed our peace...
Grant love to those who have refused us love...
Protect from injury those who have done us injury...
Grant success to those who have worked to our loss...
Give prosperity to those who have taken what was ours...
Ack! These words on the page brought back all the feelings of the betrayal and theft, the disillusionment and heartache!
But I decided to pray for the prosperity and success of this man and his fellows who set up the betrayal!
Frankly, I was surprised, because I thought I was done with it all...but I was still staying away from places where I might see one of them. I certainly wasn't praying for their prosperity or success. But I absolutely hated having the hurt come up again. I just don't want to carry any of that any more.
My friend Kay had told me just recently that I needed to go back to the places where I could run into them, so that one of them might have an opportunity to apologize, and I realized that I am still under the situation if I am allowing it to keep me isolated.
So the other morning, I WILLED to pray that way for the people responsible for my pain. Give them prosperity and success, God. Grant them protection from the pain of betrayal. Grant them love. Grant them peace.
It was a simple act of the will. BUT I have been like a new person since! Really!
I have more energy, more enthusiasm about each day! I have found a deep JOY that I haven't had since the betrayal!!!
And I am FEELING it too. I mean, only through the grace of God, I am not holding onto the pain or anything. Through God's grace, I am MEANING it when I pray good for this person!
Yesterday I had the energy to do a little yard work, bake a double batch of muffins, do errands I had been putting off, and smile all day!
Please, my friends, if those words in the prayers above touched anything in you, DO IT! Step into this level of forgiveness and find this joy! Yesterday I prayed the Lord's prayer several times -- at Mass and in the rosary -- and each time I said:
Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.
I found myself smiling! Imagine You, God, forgiving me this much! Alleluia!
Friday, March 25, 2011
Simple Obedience
It's been interesting since I DECIDED to change my heart! :-)
I emailed good friends to see about getting together, and before the first day was even started, another friend called to ask me to meet her at a fast food place for lunch that very day.
That afternoon, a couple young mothers at the theater started chatting, and we all went into a faith sharing moment!
The next day, a sweet mom hung around a little after dropping off her little one for class, and it happened again.
Of course, the next day Gabi's mom came in for Gabi's classes, and I had to tell her about the blog, and how Gabi inspired me. We were both close to tears with that!
God is so sweet! He asks me to do something (like just shake off the self-pity and reach out to the people you love and need) and then He gives you a hundredfold in return.
I guess the lessons are always simple. Obedience to His urgings turns into JOY. Just like little Gabi was so joy-filled when she lifted her arms that day and said "I just decided to change my heart."
That's how I feel today.
No---life is not perfect, not by a long shot, but simple obedience to His will gives such SIMPLE JOY.
Do you have a story like this?
I emailed good friends to see about getting together, and before the first day was even started, another friend called to ask me to meet her at a fast food place for lunch that very day.
That afternoon, a couple young mothers at the theater started chatting, and we all went into a faith sharing moment!
The next day, a sweet mom hung around a little after dropping off her little one for class, and it happened again.
Of course, the next day Gabi's mom came in for Gabi's classes, and I had to tell her about the blog, and how Gabi inspired me. We were both close to tears with that!
God is so sweet! He asks me to do something (like just shake off the self-pity and reach out to the people you love and need) and then He gives you a hundredfold in return.
I guess the lessons are always simple. Obedience to His urgings turns into JOY. Just like little Gabi was so joy-filled when she lifted her arms that day and said "I just decided to change my heart."
That's how I feel today.
No---life is not perfect, not by a long shot, but simple obedience to His will gives such SIMPLE JOY.
Do you have a story like this?
Sunday, March 20, 2011
I JUST DECIDED TO CHANGE MY HEART
A few weeks ago, Gabi, a wonderful five-year-old, came in the door of Stone Oak Youth Theatre. Her mom asked her if she wanted to tell us about the day.
Smiling Gabi told us a story of NOT wanting to leave the play area at McDonald's. That being an area of contention they were working on, she told us, "I just decided to change my heart. I wanted to stay and play, but I just stopped, and thought, and decided to obey."
This moment, this comment, has had my mental attention for weeks.
~~~
So yesterday, I found myself on a self-pity pot. Now that the busyness of wedding planning was behind me, I was growing more aware of my isolation from friends. I missed the prayer group friends in St Louis, I missed my ACTS sisters from St Francis. I am so busy helping Maryclaire at the theater, teaching piano lessons, taking Grandma to her things, and trying to be a good wife to Jerry. I haven't had time -- or made the time to connect with my friends.
I went into a hole, if you know what I mean. Nothing could cheer me. Jerry and I went to morning Mass, we stopped at the grocery together, I just got grumpier and sadder, even angry. I came home and lay down on the bed, almost determined to be depressed, to sleep all day, to blame the world for my loneliness.
But Gabi's words interrupted my thoughts.
"I just decided to change my heart."
I lay there a while, and let the words permeate my own heart.
I got up.
I announced it to Jerry, who was, of course, delighted. :-)
We went out for an afternoon of exploring Johnson City, something I had wanted to do for some time now.
I decided it's up to me to call people and get back into life.
I just decided to change my heart.
In Johnson City, we toured the LBJ Texas White House, and as I read museum posts, I saw LBJ himself in a different light. In the 60s many of us blamed the VietNam war on him. I had not known about his life, his lifelong commitment to civil rights and education.
That was a change of heart.
In the evening, I found myself talking to a woman who had been very cold the last time we were together. She mentioned that she had been coming down with the flu back then, and was barely functioning when I had seen her that night.
The truth changed my heart about her behavior that evening.
~~~
Little Gabi, thank you.
I never want to forget this.
It's up to me.
I just need to DECIDE to change my heart.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Saints for Friends
It's been interesting since I felt the call to befriend the saints.
First, in tidying up, I came upon an old prayer book that Pam gave me. As I browsed through it, there was a whole section of prayers to different saints. The first one I read was a prayer to the angel who comforted Jesus on the Cross. How beautiful to think of that being, full of compassion, honored to be the one chosen to minister to Jesus, his God. I thought of how that angel might be the one who comes to us when we are enduring our crosses!
For the first time, I wrapped my mind around the PERSON of that angel, and thanked him for doing that, and asked for him to help me when I need it.
Yesterday was the feast of St Scholastica, the sister of St Benedict! So I read a little about her, and remembered the Benedictine sisters who taught me in grade school. The favorite story I remember: When Benedict had his monastery, and she had her convent of sisters, they would get together to pray and talk long into the night. On one occasion, he wanted to leave and she wanted him to stay. He was strict about his needing to go back to the monastery, but she prayed that he would stay, and God sent a horrible storm so he was forced to stay and pray with her some more! Her vibrant faith and confidence startled him! I love that! It inspired me to ask her to pray for me that I would grow in confident prayer!
Today, in moving a few things around in my prayer room, I found a real treasure I had stored there. It was a copy of the words Cindy and Jim shared at Kristen's funeral. Oh my goodness. The tears flowed, the memories played like a movie...the first time Cindy brought Kristen to prayer group, the love we all had for her, the LOVE that this little girl engendered in everyone. Her life of 18 years, how her dear Lord came for her and carried her across His threshhold! And there's the saint of this day for me! I prayed and asked Kristen to pray for my family. I also see her as a saint who taught us that all life is sacred and beautiful, no matter what we DO. Her life was not DOING, but BEING, and it was holy!
So today, I ask Kristen to pray for me to learn that my value to God is not just what I do for him, but in my being. After all, He made each one of us before we DID anything. He created us simply out of LOVE. Oh, the joy of knowing she is in heaven with Him and is still deeply connected to us who loved her unconditionally. That's what I need to do with everyone, especially family -- love unconditionally, the way she inspired us all to love her!
Thanks be to God!
First, in tidying up, I came upon an old prayer book that Pam gave me. As I browsed through it, there was a whole section of prayers to different saints. The first one I read was a prayer to the angel who comforted Jesus on the Cross. How beautiful to think of that being, full of compassion, honored to be the one chosen to minister to Jesus, his God. I thought of how that angel might be the one who comes to us when we are enduring our crosses!
For the first time, I wrapped my mind around the PERSON of that angel, and thanked him for doing that, and asked for him to help me when I need it.
Yesterday was the feast of St Scholastica, the sister of St Benedict! So I read a little about her, and remembered the Benedictine sisters who taught me in grade school. The favorite story I remember: When Benedict had his monastery, and she had her convent of sisters, they would get together to pray and talk long into the night. On one occasion, he wanted to leave and she wanted him to stay. He was strict about his needing to go back to the monastery, but she prayed that he would stay, and God sent a horrible storm so he was forced to stay and pray with her some more! Her vibrant faith and confidence startled him! I love that! It inspired me to ask her to pray for me that I would grow in confident prayer!
Today, in moving a few things around in my prayer room, I found a real treasure I had stored there. It was a copy of the words Cindy and Jim shared at Kristen's funeral. Oh my goodness. The tears flowed, the memories played like a movie...the first time Cindy brought Kristen to prayer group, the love we all had for her, the LOVE that this little girl engendered in everyone. Her life of 18 years, how her dear Lord came for her and carried her across His threshhold! And there's the saint of this day for me! I prayed and asked Kristen to pray for my family. I also see her as a saint who taught us that all life is sacred and beautiful, no matter what we DO. Her life was not DOING, but BEING, and it was holy!
So today, I ask Kristen to pray for me to learn that my value to God is not just what I do for him, but in my being. After all, He made each one of us before we DID anything. He created us simply out of LOVE. Oh, the joy of knowing she is in heaven with Him and is still deeply connected to us who loved her unconditionally. That's what I need to do with everyone, especially family -- love unconditionally, the way she inspired us all to love her!
Thanks be to God!
Friday, February 4, 2011
Thoughts about asking for prayers!
This morning, as I was praying special prayers for my children, I found myself caught up in this:
me:
Lord, Abba,
You gave us the Perfect Gift in Your Son Jesus Christ!
Jesus, You gave us the Perfect Gift, the Holy Spirit to be in us and with us forever! Heaven!
Why would we hesitate to believe that ALL good things,
very small in comparison,
ALL good things--
peripheral to the ENORMOUS PERFECT GIFT
would not be given also?!
Yet You also will that we,
and the angels and saints
play a part in the goodness,
not simply sit back and watch You do it,
but we all get to play a little part in it.
I sense that as I have been praying for the family to be more tightly bonded, You are answering that prayer by changing me and giving me more unconditional love for them all. That will naturally bring us all closer.
me:
Lord, Abba,
You gave us the Perfect Gift in Your Son Jesus Christ!
Jesus, You gave us the Perfect Gift, the Holy Spirit to be in us and with us forever! Heaven!
Why would we hesitate to believe that ALL good things,
very small in comparison,
ALL good things--
peripheral to the ENORMOUS PERFECT GIFT
would not be given also?!
Yet You also will that we,
and the angels and saints
play a part in the goodness,
not simply sit back and watch You do it,
but we all get to play a little part in it.
I sense that as I have been praying for the family to be more tightly bonded, You are answering that prayer by changing me and giving me more unconditional love for them all. That will naturally bring us all closer.
God:
Learn your Father's ways,
like Jesus learning carpentry from Joseph,
and you learning from your father --
about oil wells, about snakes and spiders, about electricity and table saws, etc. From Carl, you learned to embrace it all, to fix a wall or a faucet without fear.
Well, from Me, you ALL learn My ways,
and get to participate in the love, the healings, the good works --
You pray for each other,
you stand for each other,
you serve each other,
and share faith with each other!
And you ALL continue when you enter eternity --
Constantly, you all get to continue the work of the Kingdom,
sharing, healing, helping, praying!
That's the way it goes!
That's why I want you to ask the saints on earth for prayers,
for help, for companionship.
It's all part of heaven!
And it's why I want you to ask the Saints and angels already in heaven also!
Heavenly life isn't just sitting there receiving from My Beatific Vision --
It's also giving by interceding for you all on earth.
How could you all be so filled with My Godhead,
and NOT overflow to the friends you still love on earth?
You have no idea how people in heaven have been part of blessing you all along the way. Family members who still love you from eternity, and My Mother and the saints and angels!!
Embrace them all, the way you embrace your sisters and brothers in Christ here.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
CONFIDENCE!
Yesterday morning, I received a strong message I know I am supposed to share. It began with a quote I read:
In faith, we stumble along, toward where we think we're supposed to go,
bumbling along,
and here is what's so amazing --
we end up getting where we're supposed to be.
--Anne Lamott in Traveling Mercies
It stays with me. I need to open my heart each morning to the gifts that will come during the day ahead. I vowed, with God's grace, to pay attention to what's happening in the daily events of my life, and to delight in the lovely things that will unfold.
I also see that God is taking all my loved ones and friends to exactly where He wants them too -- through all their stumbling along too. I find myself praying for you all in a different way, a more HOPEFUL way, reinforced with the truth that He's along all your journeys too! I am praying for you all, and all my family too, with a smile in my heart, SURE that He is getting all of us to where we're supposed to be!
A scripture reading yesterday was Hebrews 10:32-39. God telling us to remember that after we have been "enlightened" (for me, this is the reception of the baptism of the Holy Spirit) then we endured a great contest of suffering.
I certainly have seen this in my life! Oh my goodness, let's don't go there again! I am still not out of it.
But the reading goes on to say:
THEREFORE, do not throw away your confidence; it will have great recompense!
God added:
You need endurance in order to do My will, and receive what I promise. Hold to CONFIDENCE in My promises. Look into the future and act on THAT instead of what appears now! For after a brief moment I WILL come, I WILL NOT DELAY!
In faith, we stumble along, toward where we think we're supposed to go,
bumbling along,
and here is what's so amazing --
we end up getting where we're supposed to be.
--Anne Lamott in Traveling Mercies
It stays with me. I need to open my heart each morning to the gifts that will come during the day ahead. I vowed, with God's grace, to pay attention to what's happening in the daily events of my life, and to delight in the lovely things that will unfold.
I also see that God is taking all my loved ones and friends to exactly where He wants them too -- through all their stumbling along too. I find myself praying for you all in a different way, a more HOPEFUL way, reinforced with the truth that He's along all your journeys too! I am praying for you all, and all my family too, with a smile in my heart, SURE that He is getting all of us to where we're supposed to be!
A scripture reading yesterday was Hebrews 10:32-39. God telling us to remember that after we have been "enlightened" (for me, this is the reception of the baptism of the Holy Spirit) then we endured a great contest of suffering.
I certainly have seen this in my life! Oh my goodness, let's don't go there again! I am still not out of it.
But the reading goes on to say:
THEREFORE, do not throw away your confidence; it will have great recompense!
God added:
You need endurance in order to do My will, and receive what I promise. Hold to CONFIDENCE in My promises. Look into the future and act on THAT instead of what appears now! For after a brief moment I WILL come, I WILL NOT DELAY!
My friends, I know this is for you too! Pray with confidence! We will all end up exactly where we are supposed to be.
Saving the world through our gifts.
Hello!
Thursday and Friday everything worked out for mother's little lawsuit. All because of Josh and his goodness. Josh always wanted to be a superhero when he was little, and in my eyes, he has accomplished his goal.
He knew I was crazy and busy with our last weeks of wedding planning. He did some calling around, found a lawyer in the county where the suit is filed, talked to him on the phone about the whole thing, and yesterday that lawyer did what was necessary at this point for mother. So Josh called me in the morning to say it was done. I will be glad to get the bill in the mail, whatever it is!
I know that God's will is for us to take what talents and gifts we have been given, and use them to make the world better. I have confidence that Josh will be doing this all his life.
Jerry always joked about wanting to "save the world through mathematics." Actually, that's what we are all called to do. To "save the world through you-name-your-gift." People tell me that mine is encouragement through story-telling. With a little prayerful thought, each of us could name the unearned gift(s) that God has given us, with this end in mind -- to help others, to spread the good news of faith, or hope, or charity!
I look at you, my friends, and I see the gifts! The gift of intercession, the gift of perseverance, the gift of laughter, the gift of entertainment, the gift of serenity, the gift of faithful friendship.
Today I thank God for all of the gifts He so generously has bestowed in all the people He has created! All for the good of the rest of us! Alleluia!
Thursday and Friday everything worked out for mother's little lawsuit. All because of Josh and his goodness. Josh always wanted to be a superhero when he was little, and in my eyes, he has accomplished his goal.
He knew I was crazy and busy with our last weeks of wedding planning. He did some calling around, found a lawyer in the county where the suit is filed, talked to him on the phone about the whole thing, and yesterday that lawyer did what was necessary at this point for mother. So Josh called me in the morning to say it was done. I will be glad to get the bill in the mail, whatever it is!
I know that God's will is for us to take what talents and gifts we have been given, and use them to make the world better. I have confidence that Josh will be doing this all his life.
Jerry always joked about wanting to "save the world through mathematics." Actually, that's what we are all called to do. To "save the world through you-name-your-gift." People tell me that mine is encouragement through story-telling. With a little prayerful thought, each of us could name the unearned gift(s) that God has given us, with this end in mind -- to help others, to spread the good news of faith, or hope, or charity!
I look at you, my friends, and I see the gifts! The gift of intercession, the gift of perseverance, the gift of laughter, the gift of entertainment, the gift of serenity, the gift of faithful friendship.
Today I thank God for all of the gifts He so generously has bestowed in all the people He has created! All for the good of the rest of us! Alleluia!
Monday, January 24, 2011
The truth will set us free.
I know that. I believe it. This weekend, I lived it, and I still do today.
The back story: Grandma (little sweet 90 year young Grandma) got a lawsuit delivered in early January. I read and re-read it, and realized that this has to do with a well that Daddy was part of planning in 1973. The suit is really against a large oil company, but because my father had a tiny percentage-of-a-percentage of royalties on the well, which helps to support my mother still, mother was named in the suit. There were pages and pages of questions mother has to answer and send back before the end of the month, and I couldn't make any sense of them!
The wording of the suit was threatening, and I knew mother would know nothing about it, and I didn't want to upset her, so I started asking a few people, but mostly I did nothing. A phone call to an oil company went unreturned, another phone call to the big one being sued led to a couple re-routings, and the last one went unreturned. I looked at the calendar going by, and was just frozen with fear. Trusting God, but not knowing what to do next.
So our dear dear son-in-law (in the last semester of law school) insisted on making the drive to San Antonio to look at the bulk of papers they had delivered, in spite of my protests that it would be too hard on Beckie and the baby to drive over.
Josh read it, told me what to get ready for any lawyer I might talk to. God had prepared me, because last week I was driven to straighten up mother's papers that we had moved into my dining room when she moved to assisted living. Josh even did some online research and found a legal group very near to our neighborhood. He let me know the serious nature of the suit, but also encouraged me and urged me to call them and leave a message over the weekend. So I am sitting here waiting for a return call this morning. These people may help, or maybe they will direct me to another attorney who knows more about our issue.
So the truth isn't all good, but it isn't all bad, and I don't need to curl up in a ball of fear!
I thanked Josh for coming and told him that FEAR had had me paralyzed, but knowing the logical truth of the situation had freed me to be fearless and trusting that God and smart lawyers can clear up this situation.
And there is the lesson...FEAR is horrible. It bound me up with irons and shackles and I couldn't make myself move. But TRUTH is like a key to unlock all that stuff and I can move again.
God is teaching me something here. Like the fear that sometimes keeps us away from confession...fear of speaking aloud the things about our wrong choices, things that we would rather not hear. Yet, when I go to confession, I always come out of that door ready to run and jump and celebrate, and move forward!
Thank You, God for another good lesson. I have to LIVE them to LEARN them.
I know that. I believe it. This weekend, I lived it, and I still do today.
The back story: Grandma (little sweet 90 year young Grandma) got a lawsuit delivered in early January. I read and re-read it, and realized that this has to do with a well that Daddy was part of planning in 1973. The suit is really against a large oil company, but because my father had a tiny percentage-of-a-percentage of royalties on the well, which helps to support my mother still, mother was named in the suit. There were pages and pages of questions mother has to answer and send back before the end of the month, and I couldn't make any sense of them!
The wording of the suit was threatening, and I knew mother would know nothing about it, and I didn't want to upset her, so I started asking a few people, but mostly I did nothing. A phone call to an oil company went unreturned, another phone call to the big one being sued led to a couple re-routings, and the last one went unreturned. I looked at the calendar going by, and was just frozen with fear. Trusting God, but not knowing what to do next.
So our dear dear son-in-law (in the last semester of law school) insisted on making the drive to San Antonio to look at the bulk of papers they had delivered, in spite of my protests that it would be too hard on Beckie and the baby to drive over.
Josh read it, told me what to get ready for any lawyer I might talk to. God had prepared me, because last week I was driven to straighten up mother's papers that we had moved into my dining room when she moved to assisted living. Josh even did some online research and found a legal group very near to our neighborhood. He let me know the serious nature of the suit, but also encouraged me and urged me to call them and leave a message over the weekend. So I am sitting here waiting for a return call this morning. These people may help, or maybe they will direct me to another attorney who knows more about our issue.
So the truth isn't all good, but it isn't all bad, and I don't need to curl up in a ball of fear!
I thanked Josh for coming and told him that FEAR had had me paralyzed, but knowing the logical truth of the situation had freed me to be fearless and trusting that God and smart lawyers can clear up this situation.
And there is the lesson...FEAR is horrible. It bound me up with irons and shackles and I couldn't make myself move. But TRUTH is like a key to unlock all that stuff and I can move again.
God is teaching me something here. Like the fear that sometimes keeps us away from confession...fear of speaking aloud the things about our wrong choices, things that we would rather not hear. Yet, when I go to confession, I always come out of that door ready to run and jump and celebrate, and move forward!
Thank You, God for another good lesson. I have to LIVE them to LEARN them.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Heaven on Earth
All the way to heaven IS heaven, I was reminded this morning! Even the yucky stuff.
Yesterday I had an divine appointment with a friend and God! Neither of us expected it -- it wasn't planned -- in fact, I hadn't planned even to be in that spot, yet unexpectedly we found ourselves alone and uninterrupted. In that sacred moment, I shared stuff, she shared stuff, and we took our problems together to the Lord! Moments like that are just amazing to me, that God sets it all up, and there you are, sharing faith and feelings, comforting, bonding in His love, and letting the moment heal us!
That visit (God gave us more than an hour!) was a little piece of heaven, and I am so grateful. We shared the good, the bad and the ugly, I am reminded again this morning of the quote I read in a book months ago:
Someday, this too will be a pleasure to recall.
Hard to think that the worst things we experience fall into this category...but they DO! To believe this is really to trust God, isn't it?
My friend Mary Jo has a favorite prayer she prays daily:
Dear God, thank You for my life EXACTLY as it is.
This morning, I heard a little heart message for my new faith-sharing friend, and I know it's for us all:
Go to Mass as often as possible.
Let it be your ICU ward when you are in pain.
You go to Mass with all your brokenness and sin, and offer it with the gifts on the altar.
There is no room in the words of the liturgy for your moods and emotions,
but in the Mass, all the focus is on the PRIMARY TRUTH of My perfect love and perfect sacrifice.
You give yourself into My Hands totally,
and receive yourself back transformed and consecrated.
So now, of course, I need to get dressed and over to daily Mass myself! :-)
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Thanks be to God
Oh, my goodness!
Everything that tried to make me anxious yesterday dissolved like dew in the sunshine! Let that be a lesson to me!
While I was writing yesterday, I was interrupted by a beautiful phone call, wherein I found that I had HELP with one of the issues from my wonderful son-in-love, Josh.
Then the miracle I had begged for yesterday was answered when we really thought there was NO WAY. I couldn't believe it!
So this morning when I woke up, there was a little demon of dread just waiting to start me on worrying about other things. But the memory was just too great, and I shushed him off with "This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it!"
How are you doing with anxiety? Is this sharing helping?
Everything that tried to make me anxious yesterday dissolved like dew in the sunshine! Let that be a lesson to me!
While I was writing yesterday, I was interrupted by a beautiful phone call, wherein I found that I had HELP with one of the issues from my wonderful son-in-love, Josh.
Then the miracle I had begged for yesterday was answered when we really thought there was NO WAY. I couldn't believe it!
So this morning when I woke up, there was a little demon of dread just waiting to start me on worrying about other things. But the memory was just too great, and I shushed him off with "This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it!"
How are you doing with anxiety? Is this sharing helping?
Friday, January 14, 2011
ack!
Ack! Just realized that I have to go with Maryclaire for her fitting -- the wedding is a month away. I can't be here at 9:00 am myself! Carry on without me. :-) Or plan on checking in later!
What a morning! Awake around 3:45 and already obsessing and dreading the day ahead. Worried about everyone else's expectations of me and all that I need to be and do for the people around me, realizing that I fall short, and wondering how it will all go! What a way to start a day!
I knew what was going on, God was calling me to get up and come spend time with Him in prayer. In my mind I told Him it was too early and I needed sleep...but the "dread" wouldn't go away, so I knew what I needed to do. :-)
There came the scripture verse from Philippians again:
I knew what was going on, God was calling me to get up and come spend time with Him in prayer. In my mind I told Him it was too early and I needed sleep...but the "dread" wouldn't go away, so I knew what I needed to do. :-)
There came the scripture verse from Philippians again:
Have no anxiety at all,
but present your needs to God in prayer and petition,
with thanksgiving,
and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding
will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
So I got up around 4:30 and made my coffee, snuggled into my comfy chair with my notebook/journal and a pen.
I decided to take it like a homework assignment.
Ok, Lord, thank you for life, for air and water, for creating us, for all the good things in the day yesterday, a good long phone visit with a friend, etc...
And thank you for all the things required of me today...Thanks for the good and the bad, the things I don't want to do and the things and reactions of all the people around me today.
I heard the scripture words in my head again,--PRESENT YOUR NEEDS TO GOD --and wrote:
I sure am tempted to be anxious about everything today. Please take care of it all. You have it all in Your hands, and You hold me in Your arms, and You protect me from everything negative.
The more I wrote, the more I started to see that I was hanging on to OTHER people's needs and somehow thinking I was responsible for everyone else's attitudes around me all the time! It was a good eye-opener, sort of like God reminding me that I'm not everyone's savior. Only Jesus is a Savior! I realized again that this attitude of mine is just something left over from my childhood, and it's pretty entrenched in me.
So I wrote:
Here. I present this to you, Jesus. I need healing and I need Your forgiveness. I need to be made new. You're the God who parted the Red Sea, who created all the universe out of NOTHING, who rose from the dead, who ascended into heaven (I even got a kick out of imagining the apostles watching Him go up. Can't think how I would have reacted!)
And guess what? In those 15 minutes of writing, no situation had changed, but I was more peaceful. Really.
I let God guide my thinking while I was writing, and I actually saw some of the nonsense in my thinking, and some of the sense too. Writing it out slowed me down and it was GOOD.
I totally recommend it!
Thursday, January 13, 2011
God's Presence
Another echo this morning. This time both meditation books mentioned God's presence.
The first one I read is Daily Guideposts. You can get this online at www.dailyguideposts.com or even find it on Facebook. The story today talked about a little boy playing with his toy people, acting out a scenario where they were in a snake-infested jungle and it was dark and they were scared, and then said loudly, "But God was with them!"
It was a good little thought, that no matter what is going on, how dark and scary it might be, God is with us. Made me think about the book of Revelation in Chapter 20. It talks about the terrible things going on in the world, and the picture you get is little encampments of God's people, huddled in little circles here and there...all the tumult around them. And then the words of scripture say, "but God brought them out of it". PERIOD. We don't know exactly how or when, but HE WILL. He always does.
In my life, there have been times when I was in such darkness! And God always brought me through. And I learned much during these times...
the most important lesson was to TRUST in Him. I always say that you can't manufacture trust in yourself. It comes from the experience of going through one problem after another, and seeing that God never leaves our side, even through the worst things. Then the TRUST happens because we have experienced this often enough to know that He will always be there.
In the dark moment, it's still easy for me to fall into the panic mode, but I need to remember that I am never alone.
So that leads me to the message shared in The Word Among Us today (wau.org)...it was about our need to PRACTICE remembering the presence of God all through each day! The call was to be pro-active throughout the day, remembering God, seeing Him in every situation, every person's face, every piece of creation.
To PRACTICE by thanking Him for everything, and by reading some scripture daily. I pray with a journal, and I always begin by writing down and thanking God for the blessings of the previous day. It helps me to pay attention to the prayers that were answered and the good things that happened, because sometimes I tend to live through them and never say thank you, and just go on to to the next thing.
I think God might be asking us to set aside a real appointment to spend some time with Him every day. If you don't already, try to find a time each day to do this. You will be amazed and delighted, because He is so anxious for you to give Him time, He will really bless you because of it!
And when He does, I hope you will share it with the rest of us!
The first one I read is Daily Guideposts. You can get this online at www.dailyguideposts.com or even find it on Facebook. The story today talked about a little boy playing with his toy people, acting out a scenario where they were in a snake-infested jungle and it was dark and they were scared, and then said loudly, "But God was with them!"
It was a good little thought, that no matter what is going on, how dark and scary it might be, God is with us. Made me think about the book of Revelation in Chapter 20. It talks about the terrible things going on in the world, and the picture you get is little encampments of God's people, huddled in little circles here and there...all the tumult around them. And then the words of scripture say, "but God brought them out of it". PERIOD. We don't know exactly how or when, but HE WILL. He always does.
In my life, there have been times when I was in such darkness! And God always brought me through. And I learned much during these times...
the most important lesson was to TRUST in Him. I always say that you can't manufacture trust in yourself. It comes from the experience of going through one problem after another, and seeing that God never leaves our side, even through the worst things. Then the TRUST happens because we have experienced this often enough to know that He will always be there.
In the dark moment, it's still easy for me to fall into the panic mode, but I need to remember that I am never alone.
So that leads me to the message shared in The Word Among Us today (wau.org)...it was about our need to PRACTICE remembering the presence of God all through each day! The call was to be pro-active throughout the day, remembering God, seeing Him in every situation, every person's face, every piece of creation.
To PRACTICE by thanking Him for everything, and by reading some scripture daily. I pray with a journal, and I always begin by writing down and thanking God for the blessings of the previous day. It helps me to pay attention to the prayers that were answered and the good things that happened, because sometimes I tend to live through them and never say thank you, and just go on to to the next thing.
I think God might be asking us to set aside a real appointment to spend some time with Him every day. If you don't already, try to find a time each day to do this. You will be amazed and delighted, because He is so anxious for you to give Him time, He will really bless you because of it!
And when He does, I hope you will share it with the rest of us!
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Persevere
This morning I got a "God Echo." My friend Father Steve R said once that when you hear the same thing echoed two or three times, pay attention, because it's usually a message from God.
Today it was PERSEVERE. First, in one meditation book, the quote was to "forget what lies behind, and press on to what lies ahead."
What I "heard" was that when our souls are weary and our faith tends to fail, PRESS ON. I wondered about this, because, while I am usually feeling "weary" with everything in life, today I was feeling pretty good.
The next words I read sparked this little message from Jesus:
Stay focused on Me.
Lift your gaze to heaven, and deepen your grasp what I did for you.
Persevere
Don't be afraid, don't get paranoid.
When things are easy or difficult, keep your focus.
Desire for Me,
Focus on Me will eclipse your problems
Trust in My mercy overcomes your fears, your sins, your guilt.
So you can run the race without stopping.
I am close to you all day long.
It occurred to me that perhaps someone else might need this thought today, so I am putting it out there. I am going to be focusing today.
I welcome your thoughts.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Welcome to Prayer Group!
Hello everyone!
In 1999, a year after we moved to St Louis Mo, the Holy Spirit started giving me all these "holy coincidences" that led me to start a prayer group in our home. It was the best 9 years of my life! Our prayer, care, share group was a way we all linked arms and walked the path on which He led us! The gifts flowed! We all learned and loved and laughed and cried together. It seemed that God taught me all sorts of things during those days, and many of His lessons were the messages He wanted us all to share on Friday mornings.
So here we are Jan 11, 2011 (1/11/11)! And He seems to want the Flock That He Shepherds to go high-tech. (Although it's not that high-tech by today's standards, it's a new thing for me to blog!) So at best I plan to keep this blog going daily, after my prayer time each morning, and at least, to show up on Friday mornings, to open the door, put on some coffee, and see who wants to show up!
I didn't know how to start a Prayer Group in 1999, but He asked me to do it anyway. I don't really know where this is going to take us in 2011, but I am here anyway. I know we can comment on postings, and maybe we could all meet at 9:00 CST and make it "live" with comments.
Would you like to join a prayer group???? :-)
Terrie
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